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 ONE DAY, MOTHER
In my seventeen years, my life was great
Never did drugs, or drank alcohol to escape.
I chose the path, laid out before me
Fell in love with a man, and his son, age three.
Attended school, became a part-time Mom
Jason was his name, loved him as my son.
Although I was young, they were my love, my life
It was very hard work, and I took it all in strife.
Responsible and compassionate, just like Mother
For all that she gave me, there could be no other.
Did all that was asked of me, simply cause I loved
It was the happiest time, and all that I dreamed of.
Then one day, while the roads had patches of ice
Two cars collided, that ended both our lives.
Mine and the lil one, that was just like my son
Together, as angels, and our spirits became one.
From Heaven, I could see Mother, tears in her eyes
Whispered in her ear, "Chin up, I am right by your side."
HE took us home, HE had bigger plans for us
Don't cry, Mother, our spirits are with you from above.
So do what you do best, keep searching for them
Birthmothers and adoptees, reunited in the end.
Know that your heart, is one shared by me
For one day, Mother, we will again be three.
Author: Lucille aka sueme2@aol.com
Copyright, 2004
In Loving Memory of Lori,
JoAnne's Beautiful Daughter
The following poem was written in 2004 by a reunited birthmother when we feared we'd have to close down due to lack of funds.
Our Final Farewell
I've grown so old, my bones are aching me now
Hands too slow to type, can't hardly read anyhow.
Eyeglasses so thick, I could use a magnifying glass
Hemorrhoids are so itchy, I'm always scratching my a$$.
How can I find for anyone, been doing it so many years
Last time I had a find, I mismatched a young man with a deer.
My halo is lopsided, my cane is useless as well
I'll close the registry behind me, before everything goes to hell.
All my search angels, have long since left me you see
You didn't send your donations, broken promises is all I received.
I couldn't afford to pay them, I was drowning in bills of my own
It got so bad, I had to sell, what was once my happy home.
Doesn't matter anyway, I've done all that I could do
HE gave me what I needed, and HE saw me through.
Now that I'm in Heaven, with MeeMaw at my side
These two search angels, bid you farewell and goodbye.
There is one more thing to say, I almost forgot to mention
I hired MeeMaw as my sentinel, to stand guard at the Gates of Heaven.
She will be collecting all the monies, I waived over the years
Add that with interest, or you will be escorted downstairs.
Author: Lucille aka sueme2@aol.com
Copyright, 2004
To The Little Boy Who Stole My Heart
My heart has never stopped longing,
My soul has never been at peace,
My laughter never my heartiest,
My sorrow never so deep.
But my son, I always knew,
That your life without me,
Would be happier, healthier,
And that you werent mine to keep.
Memories of your birth day,
Come back to me in pieces,
The joy of a healthy baby,
The anguish of separation,
The tears that I would weep.
I thought of you everyday,
And sent you happy wishes,
But it never helped to ease the pain,
Of the empty spot in my heart.
A spot that only you could fill,
No matter what would happen,
And now you were someone elses son,
And wed always be apart.
But now so many years later,
You have given me the greatest gift,
A birthmom could ever wish for,
A chance to meet you once again,
And my heart is soaring.
I cant wait to hear the voice,
To look into the eyes,
Of that little boy who stole my heart,
And to see the man he has become.
So now my heart is full of happiness,
My restless soul at peace,
My frequent laughter surprises me,
And my joy is oh so deep.
Author: Pat H
Written by a birth mother on the eve of their first face-to-face reunion.
Below is an adoptee's touching letter to her birthmother.
Most adoptees will relate to the feelings expressed here.
Mama, can you hear me ?
Mama, can you feel me ?
Mama, do you think of me ?
So many times I have cried thinking silently these questions;
sometime during loneliness, sometimes during joyous triumphs,
and always on my birthday.
Yours is the face I cannot remember and possibly never saw.
Yours is the touch I may never have felt. But through all
these years, I have taken your decision as a decision of love.
I have been blessed with loving nurturing parents; parents
who have sacrificed to provide me with all my needs and support.
But there has been an emptiness that has followed me all my life.
That emptiness is, not knowing you.
I do not know the circumstances you faced when I was born.
I have often wondered if I was too much of a financial burden
to keep. I have wondered if my creation was in the act of
violence. I have wondered if possible health issues prevented
you fulfilling your role as my mother. I have tried to fight
the thoughts that I was unwanted or that I brought you pain
and shame, but they are also still in my mind.
Mama, I want you to know that I am fine. I have lived, loved,
and been loved. I am a strong woman and a survivor. I have had
winning successes and failures and met them all straight forward.
My heart is full, my mind is sharp, and I have been blessed with
good health. But Mama I am driven with the need to know.
Until the birth of my two beautiful sons, I had never looked
into eyes that resembled my own. My interests and talents do
not compare to anyone in my family. Although welcomed and
loved, there has always been a part of me that simply did not
completely fit and I have had to bare this all my life. I have
taken this into every new relationship, as well. This is my
mental battle, not yours and I do not blame you for it.
In times of great sorrow and loneliness, I have dreamed that
you and my siblings were happy and well. This brought me
comfort. There have been times I felt you may have passed,
leaving this world, and becoming the angel on my shoulder
that pulled me through the rough times in my life. Then there
are the times I wake in terror, feeling unexplained fear and
pain, wondering if you were alright. Mama, I have to know.
If somehow my many searches or messages ever reach you, I
hope you feel the love behind my quest. I hope you are not
plagued with unhappy memories, fear, guilt,or regret. I do
not wish you pain and I hope never to cause you shame. I also
know there may not be room for me in your life now. I only
pray you will give me some long awaited answers to my many
questions and a bit of your time.
I hope before I leave this world, I will have the opportunity
to hold you in my arms and say thank you.
Thank you Mama, I love you.
Infant of Robertson,
Susan Coffey Werth
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